Cheche and GIR did it!!! Yes, you can be skeptic. GIR distracted everyone and Cheche grabbed all the copies she saw and deleted it off their entire database. She even managed to hypnotize one of the guards and ask whether there was any other possible ways they could play the video, and he told her no. I walked past the studio and managed to make my way inside and everyone was freaking out, screaming "WHERE ARE THE TAPES?!?!?!?" haha!
Just to be sure, I also sent them to Dib's house... GIR distracted Dib- can't believe he fell for that... while Cheche deleted it off his laptop and every other device he owned and ate every copy in the room- and she used a kinda x-ray thing to find everyone. She did the same thing to Dib that she did to the guard, and I AM POSITIVE he fell for it- he had all the symtoms to being under a hypnotic spell. And I did a test on him to check that he was. We asked him whether he had anymore copies, and he did! Thanks for telling me about the hidden ones in the vault, Dib. I had Cheche run a scan on the entire city, including computers, and there wasn't a trace of any. There's no way there is any footage that still exists.
Z
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Dib, Dib, Dib...
Any of you readers who keep up with Dib's boring blog will know that he has sent the tapes of me going to get Gir to Mysterious Mysteries. Seeing as I read his blog, I've sent Cheche after them. I'm just posting this in case any of you were worried.
Seeya!
Zim
Seeya!
Zim
Friday, March 26, 2010
YAWN!
Life on planet Earth is uneventful. I don't know how you humans can STAND to be here all of your miserable short lives. I look forward to leaving this planet behind and never looking back. (Though of course I will... seeing a planet being destroyed is so FUNNY! You will not believe it!) The only thing that gets me through this miserable existance on this planet is knowing I will not be here forever. I will leave, preferably sooner than later. Oh my god.... times like these... I thought inspiration would strike. It clearly isn't, but I will blab on about my problems to you anyway, and maybe tell you a story Care told me at school. She's a huge fan of Jhonen Vasquez, (=P) so she wants to make it into a comic. Too bad she sucks at drawing.
Haha! I'm kidding. Fool, you thought I was serious, didn't you?!? I never insult my stink-human friends. Did I ever mention to you how Jhonen got the idea for Invader Zim? (He may have a different account on how it happened, but this is the truth! -or maybe not...- DUH DUH DUUUUUH!!!)
I was checking out planets for Tallest Miyuki with a bunch of other irkens, school buds. (We hated each other.) Believe it or not, it was Red and Purple, along with Skooge. We came to Earth, and began to search for it. Red and Purple forgot about it, which is why they thought they were sending me nowhere.
So, while checking out this strange planet, a human saw us. We didn't have our disguises on, so we quickly grabbed the little latino child. We couldn't agree on what to do with it- Red and I wanted to just kill the little creepy child, who was staring at us with these giant eyes but Purple and Skooge were arguing not to. So.. we put him down and hoped he'd just be assumed crazy. Cool story, huh? I know it's not, haha.
Hm... new topics. I'm sitting on the couch, trying to think of things to talk about. I don't really know much. I'm trying to write a real loooooong post so you people who actually read this won't bite my head off when I don't post for 2 days again. Well, I'll go to last resorts. I'll tell you Care's story. She's actually sitting right next to me right now, watching TV, occasionally peering over at me then turning back to look at the television screen as I growl and snap at her for watching me write. I hate it when people watch me write. I only do it if I reaaalllly have to. I'll post the actual writing of it when she finishes typing it... so it'll be a lot better. I'm not gonna include all the details. Here goes...
The story starts in a seemingly normal suburb. All the houses are exactly the same, except for one, in the middle of the street. What's this? There's movement! Every door excluding the middle one opens, and out of each house a man steps out. Each man looks exactly the same, from his balding head to his raggedy slippers and #1 DAD cup. They shuffle out toward the newspaper, and all in one fluid motion pick it up. They take a sip of their coffee and walk simultaneously back into their homes.
A boy pokes his head out of the middle home. He is normal, but not in the same "normal" way the neighbors are. He slings his bag over his shoulder and takes a step out of the door. In that millisecond he steps out of the door the bus appears in front of his house. He gets in and leaves.
around 6 hours later...
The boy returns home. He is practically hurled from the bus as it speeds away, barely waiting for him to leave. He enters his home and POP! His hair grows into a stylish emo cut. (She thinks that's stylish. I'm quoting here!) POP! His eyes grow bigger and more haunted looking. BOOM! His shirt turns from a smiley face to a skull. His Adidas turn into black converse high tops and his jeans turn into skinny jeans. He is now an emo boy. A cat twines itself around his legs and meows pitifully. He sighs and grabs a leash, clipping it onto the kitty's collar.
Outside, all of his neighbors are sitting on lawn chairs reading the same book. EVERY SINGLE ONE. (she doesn't know what book yet.) He begins to walk his cat when all the neighbors look up at him. He starts to get nervous, tugging on the leash to get his cat to move faster. A little line of identical neighbor boys walk up to him, holding a red ball in their hands. The same boy plays in each yard. They look up at Jay (that's his name)
"What's your name?" The little boys ask.
"Jay." Jay replies. "What's yours?"
"Tommy." The little boys all said at the same time. "Jay is a wierd name." They finish.
"Um... I guess." Jay says.
"Walking your cat is wierd too." They say, "Why don't you act more normal?"
" 'Cause I don't want to." Jay says. The boys start to shake. They begin to convulse violently, falling to the ground shakily. They open their eyes and stare at Jay, who backs up in horror when he sees their black eyes. They open their mouth and the inside of their mouth is black too.
"Kill the nonbeliever!" They shriek. Jay yells in fear as the children's faces split in half, exposing a new, buglike face underneath. A giant bug crawled out of the children's bodies, about the same size as the children were. He looked around and all of the neighbors had split open and hundreds of bugs are crawling towards him. His cat hisses and hides behind his legs. He shrieks and runs to his door.
There is a single frame of the insects surrounding his door before he opened his door and ran inside. He stands for a moment before collapsing onto his couch. He closes his eyes and when he opens them his parents are standing in front of him.
"The neighbors are complaining." The mother says, glaring sternly. "They say you're disrupting the peace."
"Why'd we have the wierd kid?" The dad grumbles.
"I don't want to be normal!" Jay presses. "I didn't do anything but walk the cat!"
"Normal is in your blood." His parents hiss, and their faces split, revealing the hideous bug creatures. Jay runs up to his room and locks himself in.
This is a really bad rendering of it.... I will put the finished one up when Care finishes it.
I'M GOING TO A 3 DAYS GRACE CONCERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAAAAAYYY!
Z OUT!
Haha! I'm kidding. Fool, you thought I was serious, didn't you?!? I never insult my stink-human friends. Did I ever mention to you how Jhonen got the idea for Invader Zim? (He may have a different account on how it happened, but this is the truth! -or maybe not...- DUH DUH DUUUUUH!!!)
I was checking out planets for Tallest Miyuki with a bunch of other irkens, school buds. (We hated each other.) Believe it or not, it was Red and Purple, along with Skooge. We came to Earth, and began to search for it. Red and Purple forgot about it, which is why they thought they were sending me nowhere.
So, while checking out this strange planet, a human saw us. We didn't have our disguises on, so we quickly grabbed the little latino child. We couldn't agree on what to do with it- Red and I wanted to just kill the little creepy child, who was staring at us with these giant eyes but Purple and Skooge were arguing not to. So.. we put him down and hoped he'd just be assumed crazy. Cool story, huh? I know it's not, haha.
Hm... new topics. I'm sitting on the couch, trying to think of things to talk about. I don't really know much. I'm trying to write a real loooooong post so you people who actually read this won't bite my head off when I don't post for 2 days again. Well, I'll go to last resorts. I'll tell you Care's story. She's actually sitting right next to me right now, watching TV, occasionally peering over at me then turning back to look at the television screen as I growl and snap at her for watching me write. I hate it when people watch me write. I only do it if I reaaalllly have to. I'll post the actual writing of it when she finishes typing it... so it'll be a lot better. I'm not gonna include all the details. Here goes...
The story starts in a seemingly normal suburb. All the houses are exactly the same, except for one, in the middle of the street. What's this? There's movement! Every door excluding the middle one opens, and out of each house a man steps out. Each man looks exactly the same, from his balding head to his raggedy slippers and #1 DAD cup. They shuffle out toward the newspaper, and all in one fluid motion pick it up. They take a sip of their coffee and walk simultaneously back into their homes.
A boy pokes his head out of the middle home. He is normal, but not in the same "normal" way the neighbors are. He slings his bag over his shoulder and takes a step out of the door. In that millisecond he steps out of the door the bus appears in front of his house. He gets in and leaves.
around 6 hours later...
The boy returns home. He is practically hurled from the bus as it speeds away, barely waiting for him to leave. He enters his home and POP! His hair grows into a stylish emo cut. (She thinks that's stylish. I'm quoting here!) POP! His eyes grow bigger and more haunted looking. BOOM! His shirt turns from a smiley face to a skull. His Adidas turn into black converse high tops and his jeans turn into skinny jeans. He is now an emo boy. A cat twines itself around his legs and meows pitifully. He sighs and grabs a leash, clipping it onto the kitty's collar.
Outside, all of his neighbors are sitting on lawn chairs reading the same book. EVERY SINGLE ONE. (she doesn't know what book yet.) He begins to walk his cat when all the neighbors look up at him. He starts to get nervous, tugging on the leash to get his cat to move faster. A little line of identical neighbor boys walk up to him, holding a red ball in their hands. The same boy plays in each yard. They look up at Jay (that's his name)
"What's your name?" The little boys ask.
"Jay." Jay replies. "What's yours?"
"Tommy." The little boys all said at the same time. "Jay is a wierd name." They finish.
"Um... I guess." Jay says.
"Walking your cat is wierd too." They say, "Why don't you act more normal?"
" 'Cause I don't want to." Jay says. The boys start to shake. They begin to convulse violently, falling to the ground shakily. They open their eyes and stare at Jay, who backs up in horror when he sees their black eyes. They open their mouth and the inside of their mouth is black too.
"Kill the nonbeliever!" They shriek. Jay yells in fear as the children's faces split in half, exposing a new, buglike face underneath. A giant bug crawled out of the children's bodies, about the same size as the children were. He looked around and all of the neighbors had split open and hundreds of bugs are crawling towards him. His cat hisses and hides behind his legs. He shrieks and runs to his door.
There is a single frame of the insects surrounding his door before he opened his door and ran inside. He stands for a moment before collapsing onto his couch. He closes his eyes and when he opens them his parents are standing in front of him.
"The neighbors are complaining." The mother says, glaring sternly. "They say you're disrupting the peace."
"Why'd we have the wierd kid?" The dad grumbles.
"I don't want to be normal!" Jay presses. "I didn't do anything but walk the cat!"
"Normal is in your blood." His parents hiss, and their faces split, revealing the hideous bug creatures. Jay runs up to his room and locks himself in.
This is a really bad rendering of it.... I will put the finished one up when Care finishes it.
I'M GOING TO A 3 DAYS GRACE CONCERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAAAAAYYY!
Z OUT!
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Hangin out
Today was AWFUL! Days like these at this awful school remind me why I'm here in the first place. TO KILL YOU ALL. Dumn humans. I mean no offense towards you... but yeah, I need you to die. There are only 2 things on this stupid planet I would save: Care and her cat. They're the only humans who DON'T enfuriate me to the point of killing them. I swear! Today in Facs I was cooking with your disgusting food because it was the only STUPID elective left in your DISGUSTINGLY PATHETIC school system. How do you learn anything?!?!?!?
So I'm cooking, right? And some blejeut (best way I can translate that for y'all.) dumps WATER!!! on my HEAD!!!! So I'm rolling around in pain with the STUPID Dib-human roaring with laughter as Care tries desperately to dry me off. It didn't work. That's what I get for NOT bathing in paste today! But of course, I thought all of that was BEHIND me! UGGGH!
Mrs. Peterson didn't even know what was wrong with me. She was very concerned. Of course, Mrs. Bitters had left all my middle school teachers with a note about all my "special" issues. Water was not one of them. Anyway, I'll update again later... Cyas!
Z
So I'm cooking, right? And some blejeut (best way I can translate that for y'all.) dumps WATER!!! on my HEAD!!!! So I'm rolling around in pain with the STUPID Dib-human roaring with laughter as Care tries desperately to dry me off. It didn't work. That's what I get for NOT bathing in paste today! But of course, I thought all of that was BEHIND me! UGGGH!
Mrs. Peterson didn't even know what was wrong with me. She was very concerned. Of course, Mrs. Bitters had left all my middle school teachers with a note about all my "special" issues. Water was not one of them. Anyway, I'll update again later... Cyas!
Z
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Gimme a break!
So Dib has this STUPID idea that I'm the cause of all his problems at the moment! He thinks I BRAINWASHED his dad. WHATEVER DIB- I DID NO SUCH THING!
Other than stupid accusations, my routine is finally back to normal. I'm hanging out at my friend Care's house today, with her kitty Kat. Things are getting intense between Kat and her dog, Daisy. Care's in the bathroom at the moment, which is why I can snatch this moment to write in my blog. Care, of course, is like Dib. She instantly knew I was an alien when she saw me- it's our constant joke that she's insane too. Of course, she doesn't mind Dib all that much. She's actually kinda friends with him I guess. And she's friends his friend Sydney, so she's friends with the enemy and the enemy's friend. School has gone back to normal, I was pleased to find my grades did not slump at all..... so that's pretty much it.
IT WASN'T ME DIB!
Salut!
Zim
Other than stupid accusations, my routine is finally back to normal. I'm hanging out at my friend Care's house today, with her kitty Kat. Things are getting intense between Kat and her dog, Daisy. Care's in the bathroom at the moment, which is why I can snatch this moment to write in my blog. Care, of course, is like Dib. She instantly knew I was an alien when she saw me- it's our constant joke that she's insane too. Of course, she doesn't mind Dib all that much. She's actually kinda friends with him I guess. And she's friends his friend Sydney, so she's friends with the enemy and the enemy's friend. School has gone back to normal, I was pleased to find my grades did not slump at all..... so that's pretty much it.
IT WASN'T ME DIB!
Salut!
Zim
Friday, March 19, 2010
I'm Home!
Oh I'm finally home! That trip was wretched. So boring! I came home to find that Cheche has successfully beat up Dib and that my base was safe from all spies. I know he did his job. GIR was happy to be home. The first thing he did was cover himself in dirt, find a pig and play in the mud with it, then he ran off to find the Dib-Human.
I have no idea why GIR likes that human, but it's good to have the little guy back.
I won't get any work done tonight over the sounds of GIR favorite show however. But I'll have the whole weekend to work on my plan. I'll be back on Monday, a spring in my step, to continue ruining Dib's teenage years.
I'm kinda excited about it, really.
There isn't too much going on at the base. I'm telling Cheche (who I learned is a girl) that she'll have to get used to GIR being counterproductive. She didn't seem to understand why I don't throw him in the trash with the old roboparents. (I upgraded. MUCH more lifelike. They've been getting wierd stares, even with all the upgrades I gave them before. Not to mention they're much smarter. They're already really popular at their jobs. I gave them special 'people pleasing' skills.)
Cheche'll have to prepare herself for the coming year if she doesn't want to go insane in all the GIR stink around here. (By the way, GIR stink is stupidity. There! Now if I ever refer to GIR stink, you know what it means.)
Does anyone know where I can get a ton (I mean 1 ton) of Uranium? Maybe I need more than that.... hm.
Bye! Off to work! (Need to look that up.)
Z
I have no idea why GIR likes that human, but it's good to have the little guy back.
I won't get any work done tonight over the sounds of GIR favorite show however. But I'll have the whole weekend to work on my plan. I'll be back on Monday, a spring in my step, to continue ruining Dib's teenage years.
I'm kinda excited about it, really.
There isn't too much going on at the base. I'm telling Cheche (who I learned is a girl) that she'll have to get used to GIR being counterproductive. She didn't seem to understand why I don't throw him in the trash with the old roboparents. (I upgraded. MUCH more lifelike. They've been getting wierd stares, even with all the upgrades I gave them before. Not to mention they're much smarter. They're already really popular at their jobs. I gave them special 'people pleasing' skills.)
Cheche'll have to prepare herself for the coming year if she doesn't want to go insane in all the GIR stink around here. (By the way, GIR stink is stupidity. There! Now if I ever refer to GIR stink, you know what it means.)
Does anyone know where I can get a ton (I mean 1 ton) of Uranium? Maybe I need more than that.... hm.
Bye! Off to work! (Need to look that up.)
Z
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Stupid, Childish Dib.
Stupid Dib. Upon reading his last post, he says I'm "not smart for putting all this up on my blog". I put it up because it doesn't make a difference whether he knows about it or not. They're all trivial little details that don't matter in the slightest to me. Like Cheche. I don't care if he knows about him! No one ever believes him anyway! Anyway... I gotta go. Bye!
Saturday, March 13, 2010
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
ROAD TRIP!!! Well... Galaxy Trip....
Ah... boredom reigns on a beautiful rainy day. I wait and watch for the Dib-human as he surely makes his way over to my house to see me, holding his spy-cam in my fist. He, naturally, will destroy all illusions that this filthy planet has a right to live. Yes, you may have noticed that I am in a worse mood than ever this morning. The reason, is quite simple. I had no breakfast this morning. No, not a SMALL breakfast, NO breakfast. And I will explain to you why:
So, the Tallests actually like me now, did you know that? Yeah they're the ones who call me every week to hear updates. They've been a bit disappointed with my progress, but I assure you, I have a plan. However, the Tallests blamed my slow progress on GIR. They suggested that they give me a new one, and take the "obsolete" version off my hands. I assured them that GIR was fine with me. They still insisted I take a new one, to help me while GIR's off doing... whatever. Dancing, most likely. I accepted, knowing not to turn down the Tallests offer twice. I also had the idea that the SIR unit could teach GIR how to behave a bit more. Just a bit, is that too much to ask?!?!?!? I got the SIR unit late last night- I was deep in my lab, making some new adjustments to my PAK and downloading all the answers to my Civics test I have tomorrow. (Even extra credit hehe) By the time I got upstairs, the SIR was already settling in, cleaning the house. "Where's GIR?" I asked. Sir replied: "The defect SIR unit you know as GIR was taken to be recycled. The man who delivered me told me to tell you that he heard you say you weren't fine with him."
I will admit it. I SCREAMED. SIR got all freaked out, afraid he did something wrong, (oh yeah, his name's Cheche)
So GIR did not make me breakfast. Or lunch (He normally disguises himself as my lunchbox, which I know Dib has figured out by now) or dinner. I'M STARVING AND CHECHE DOES NOT KNOW HOW TO COOK! Even Dib noticed I didn't have my lunchbox. He even asked about it... I didn't know what to say... he'll probably read this, so he'll know. Cheche found his spy camera in about 2 seconds, which is useful, not that Dib'll be planting many more cameras.
But I'm going to find GIR. I'll keep you guys updating on where I am in the Universe, and what I'm doing- I'll even have a special page for it. Cheche is disguising himself as me so I won't be missing in school. I told him not to talk amap and to ace every test, which I'm sure he'll do.
Heading out now! Look for my lights in the sky tonight!
Z
So, the Tallests actually like me now, did you know that? Yeah they're the ones who call me every week to hear updates. They've been a bit disappointed with my progress, but I assure you, I have a plan. However, the Tallests blamed my slow progress on GIR. They suggested that they give me a new one, and take the "obsolete" version off my hands. I assured them that GIR was fine with me. They still insisted I take a new one, to help me while GIR's off doing... whatever. Dancing, most likely. I accepted, knowing not to turn down the Tallests offer twice. I also had the idea that the SIR unit could teach GIR how to behave a bit more. Just a bit, is that too much to ask?!?!?!? I got the SIR unit late last night- I was deep in my lab, making some new adjustments to my PAK and downloading all the answers to my Civics test I have tomorrow. (Even extra credit hehe) By the time I got upstairs, the SIR was already settling in, cleaning the house. "Where's GIR?" I asked. Sir replied: "The defect SIR unit you know as GIR was taken to be recycled. The man who delivered me told me to tell you that he heard you say you weren't fine with him."
I will admit it. I SCREAMED. SIR got all freaked out, afraid he did something wrong, (oh yeah, his name's Cheche)
So GIR did not make me breakfast. Or lunch (He normally disguises himself as my lunchbox, which I know Dib has figured out by now) or dinner. I'M STARVING AND CHECHE DOES NOT KNOW HOW TO COOK! Even Dib noticed I didn't have my lunchbox. He even asked about it... I didn't know what to say... he'll probably read this, so he'll know. Cheche found his spy camera in about 2 seconds, which is useful, not that Dib'll be planting many more cameras.
But I'm going to find GIR. I'll keep you guys updating on where I am in the Universe, and what I'm doing- I'll even have a special page for it. Cheche is disguising himself as me so I won't be missing in school. I told him not to talk amap and to ace every test, which I'm sure he'll do.
Heading out now! Look for my lights in the sky tonight!
Z
Friday, March 5, 2010
AHHHH!!!!
SOMEONE IS TRYING TO STEAL MY ROBOT BEE!!!!!!!!! Ok, nah I'm kidding. I just yelled that as I ran out of the girls bathroom today, mainly so Dib would still think I'm the idiot I used to be. Let me explain why I was in the girl's bathroom in the first place:
So, I was walking to school when my PAK started to malfunction. It was buzzing, which is never a good sign. I knew I'd have to make repairs, but I didn't know where, so as soon as I got into school I went into the first bathroom I could find. I didn't care it was a girls, that kinda stuff doesn't matter to irkens. I pulled my PAK off and started to work on it with the handy-dandy little repair kit from the green emergen-C box I always keep on my person. I was repairing it, and almost done when the girls came in. My Pak was buzzing, and twitching, which probably made the WORST perverted sounds to them, but I continued to work. I was almost done, so I continued for another minute before the girls eventually wondered who was in the stall. They saw my green ankle, and (curse the skin ailment) started screaming, as they naturally knew I was male. I stuck my PAK on, having finished in the nick of time and ran out of the bathroom, passing Dib on the way. No doubt he got a skewed version of it. Checking his blog now. CYAS!
Zim.
So, I was walking to school when my PAK started to malfunction. It was buzzing, which is never a good sign. I knew I'd have to make repairs, but I didn't know where, so as soon as I got into school I went into the first bathroom I could find. I didn't care it was a girls, that kinda stuff doesn't matter to irkens. I pulled my PAK off and started to work on it with the handy-dandy little repair kit from the green emergen-C box I always keep on my person. I was repairing it, and almost done when the girls came in. My Pak was buzzing, and twitching, which probably made the WORST perverted sounds to them, but I continued to work. I was almost done, so I continued for another minute before the girls eventually wondered who was in the stall. They saw my green ankle, and (curse the skin ailment) started screaming, as they naturally knew I was male. I stuck my PAK on, having finished in the nick of time and ran out of the bathroom, passing Dib on the way. No doubt he got a skewed version of it. Checking his blog now. CYAS!
Zim.
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